Water parks

Water parks are going to be opening this year for the first time without any operating bathrooms.

When asked why, the water park commented, "You all don't use them, anyways."

My wine drinking buddies and I have a secret handshake.

We pound our fists together and say, "Ching!"

Gps voices

Women are statistically more likely to listen to a males voice on a gps navigation system. 

Men are not likely to listen to anyone. 

Pun preparation

I intend to make a company that specializes in private investigation and building log cabins.

I will call the company Sure Log Homes.   

Bigots

Have you ever noticed how much it offends a racist to be called a bigot?

If I could rename my father, I would call him, Waldo.  I could always find waldo. 

Fake business idea

I want to make a fake business website that sells items that don't exist, like Jetsons cars and miniature giraffes and then take it to scientists and say, "look, I've got 20,000 orders for this products, get on inventing this.